Unfortunately, I have found that I have also regularly been mislead by them. In the end, my choice is to follow the path that Christ laid down. I do not believe that these are fundamentally in conflict, but when there is a question, Jesus wins, for me. In this case, in meditation and relaxation, I have been taught to empty my mind and heart. Breath deeply, relax, and let yourself go. Be calm and still, an empty vessel to fill. At first, that looks compatible with the Christian language of being filled with God's Spirit.
Unfortunately, when I approach God in this way, putting myself aside, I lose too many important things. For one, if I do not bring myself to offer God, what do I bring? Nothing, really. To come, as I am, messed up, stressed out, anxious, confused, frustrated, and maybe even horny when I come to God is the only way I can truly interact with Him. After all, what relationship is meaningful when you leave your heart behind? To bring all of those things to Him and surrender them to Him also means that I allow who I am to be changed. If I put all those things away when I seek Him, surely that means they are all there waiting for me again later. Lastly, I find that I rarely hear God in those moments when I am seeking that kind of stillness. Where, after all, does the voice of God speak? In the renewed, restored heart that He has placed in me, that is where I hear the quiet voice of Truth. What is gained, then, in putting my heart away for that?
No, the reality is that stillness, peace internal that ripples around us and touches the lives of those around us, that is a fruit of the Spirit. I do not get that by any effort of mine. To paraphrase Dallas Willard in the Divine Conspiracy, I might as well tape pears to my fingers and call myself a pear tree as chose to have peace by effort of will. Peace comes from a heart that is touched by God because we chose to give it over to Him. His touch, His Spirit, His Love in us, confidence in His Goodness, receiving those things from Him changes us into the pear tree. We become people who have peace, and that peace touches the lives around us. I believe it was Philip Yancey to said "Peace does not come from finding a calmer lake, it comes from having Jesus in the boat."
Jesus, I hardly seem to be able to even submit to you regularly rather than rely on the mere gifts you have given me instead. Please help me come to you, not willfully calm or still, but with all my mess, so that you can make it still.
